Unmet Expectations? Here's How To Handle
Journeying in our romantic relationship, many of us often find ourselves in the dilemma of one foot in and one foot out. We find our partner loving, caring and merry making. But sometimes, it seems that they suffocate the air of expectancy.
"Why doesn't he/she ..... How could he/she ...." pops up every time when they act to the contrast of what is obviously expected. This takes us on an internal dialog where we question our decision - are we a good match!
What to do when the vision gets stained with the acceptations and expectations?
Meet the Needs Framework
To want is being human. The 'need framework' primarily consists of certainty, priority, love, variety, growth & contribution. Undoubtedly, we are satisfying these needs of our partners, after all, this is why we chose to be in a relationship with each other. Then why is the bond freaking now? A reality check will help you figure out if you are being conditional. Take the lead to meet their needs. Give them all you have been urging for and you will attract the same.
Expectations are Goblet of Wine
You never fill your wine glass to its full capacity, so is the case with your expectations. Do not expect it to get fully satisfied in order to maintain your emotional balance. Ask yourself if 'it' really mattered? Analyze how much it is affecting quality of life. Is it worth to get out of the relationship?
Difference between 'Bond' & 'Bondage'
Lets remove the fog of ambiguity between sacred bond called love and agonizing bondage. Uncage yourself form the bondage of expectations (its a wine goblet, looks bad if filled full). Let your love breathe. Allow good room for freedom. Locked wings are painful to see. So set them free, absolutely free. They love you, they'll come back to the 'nest'. Pro tip:- Do not always expect your flights together. Respecting each others identity and individual goals is the new couple goal.
Do not Forget to Love Yourself too
If you have been dreaming to do anything, and your partner is cold about it, do it yourself. Darling, he/she is not compelled to turn your dreams to reality. Bring your heavens to the earth yourself. If you keep relying on him/her to give you what you need, you will slacken yourself to get your things done. Re-spirit your inner self and get the shit done!
Do Not Seek Attention Elsewhere
It is natural to get hurt when you are unaddressed or your meet remain unmet by your partner. But before looking for someone another for either professional, casual or romantic relationship, try to put in some more amount of patience. Waiting is far more better than hoping on to a new one in a haste.
Love - Chicken Soup for an Ailing Relationship
Darling, you will never run out of love, no matter how much you offer it. I guess people need more of love than oxygen. Compassion gives you a reason to live. It is an ultimate answer to any confusion in the relationship. Do not let your ego hold back to supply the amount of love just because of your past scars. He/she will find it difficult to ignore you when you rain them with abundance of love.
You give love and receive it compounded.
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